Men's Issues

Why should men come to therapy?

Coming to therapy as a man can be a particularly difficult step to take. We tend to grow up unconsciously absorbing the message that being strong means that we should not express our emotions, that we should be self-contained and push through challenges using determination and grit. Asking for help can feel like admitting defeat rather than taking care of oneself.

You may also have an unconscious fear of therapy. Having created an outward persona that appears to be capable, resilient and successful, taking off the mask to reveal the parts of yourself that are vulnerable and need support and help can feel risky and exposing.

Therapy is a different kind of space

Yet once you move through these initial hesitations, I hope that you will discover that the space is not like the one you had imagined. Instead of judgment, there’s room to breathe. Instead of pressure to perform, there’s an opportunity to understand yourself better—and often a quiet recognition that vulnerability isn’t a weakness at all, but a doorway into a steadier, more grounded way of living.

When Life Feels Directionless

Many men come to me for support and guidance because they feel lost and stuck. You may recognise a sense of lacking direction and purpose. What once motivated you might no longer get you out of bed in the morning. Overloaded with challenges from many directions, you may feel in crisis without being able to pinpoint exactly what is wrong. Instead, you may have an overarching sense that your life is no longer moving in the direction you want, alongside a few areas you suspect may be worth exploring. I often refer to this lack of direction and motivation as an existential crisis, as it can lead you to question the meaning and purpose of your life.

Issues I have worked with

Below are some of the challenges that my clients have brought with them to counselling.

Low mood and depression
Anxiety, rumination and overthinking
Emotional numbness
Addiction or compulsive behaviours, such as drinking or porn use
Difficulty expressing your emotions, leading to frustration and anger
A sense of being out of touch with your values, lacking direction and purpose
Relationship difficulties and communication breakdowns particularly with partners and family
Trauma, whether recent or from earlier life experiences, that continues to affect your wellbeing
Pressure to live up to masculine ideals or family expectations
A sense of isolation, loneliness, or emotional disconnection
Grief, loss, or unresolved bereavement for your past self, those close to you, or former roles and identities
Challenges related to neurodiversity (ADHD, autism)
Infidelity, intimacy concerns, or sexual dissatisfaction
Low self-esteem or lack of confidence
A loss of meaning, direction, or spiritual clarity
Resistance to seeking help, even when you know something needs to change

Finding a Way Forward Together

When working with you, I tailor my approach to your needs. Every client is different and the therapeutic approach we adopt will be uniquely matched to your experience.

You may prefer simply talking and sharing while I listen closely, offering insights and suggestions when helpful.

Or you might respond better to a more structured approach, where I ask focused questions and help make sense of your experiences through relevant counselling theories. You may also benefit from moving more slowly, gently incorporating mindfulness practices and allowing space for silence, ease, and stillness — a place from which understanding can naturally arise. Some clients like activities between sessions whilst others prefer to have unstructured time to reflect.

Or you may find that what you need changes from week to week.